I enjoy problem-solving. Especially when it is in the service of others.
Why, then, is it more difficult to take your own experience, your own advice, and apply it?
This has been an inner conflict of mine in the back half of this year, but an area in which I am improving. Being a coach has increased the likelihood I eat my own cooking. A nice perk, but there is still room for more honesty.
A process was involved in my improvement and I outline that below.
Make the mistake
Worthy advice and guidance is a product of
Lived experience
Familiar problems
Creative solutions
It will forever be exciting for me to receive a question from a friend or an athlete to which I can recognize a similar experience I have had for myself.
When we relate, we can craft more creative responses.
Errors are helpful information for what you do not want, and this year has taught me to pay better attention to errors rather than getting angry and ignoring them.
Flip the perspective
What changes when the problem becomes your own?
What drives the inability to act?
The answer is control and denial
I have found myself wanting absolute control over everything at times, while also refusing to accept current circumstances. This is hard.
Two examples illustrate this well:
I force-fed my way back to training following Fontana Triathlon in mid September and have had to pull back slightly the running. This has resulted in running less than planned, being frustrated, and not accepting the current circumstances. I fooled myself and from an outside perspective, I would never recommend the denial approach to an athlete I coach.
I performed poorly on an exam in my Neurological Disorders course. I did not do what was necessary to prepare for the demands of that exam and was thrown off when I realized, mid-exam, that I did not have control over the situation. The expectations were flawed.
When I look back at these situations, detaching from them and asking “what would you tell someone else?” has been a good exercise for me. As I mentioned, there has been some improvement in the likelihood that I implement what I tell others. It is still a work in progress.
Next time I get into a pickle, I need to stop, change lenses, and remember that I am worthy of receiving honest advice, whether it is from a mentor or if it is my own.